And finally, after several eons, Jet live on the Hunter-Ronson tour

Who on earth were Jet?, you might ask. Do we refer to that bunch of Aussie pre-teens who plundered their parents’ vinyl collections and produced a fruit-blender melange of everything that happened before they were born?

Strewth, no. We mean the UK lot, we mean the ‘glam-rock super-group who climbed aboard the sparkly bandwagon just before it’s wheels fell off, depositing the occupants in the cosmic ditch’ and we quote the NME’s Chris Salewicz, who ran out of wagon-references at the crucial moment. No matter – formed from the remnants of Sparks (bassist/writer Martin Gordon), John’s Children (singer Andy Ellison and drummer Chris Townson) and every British band you have ever heard of during the late 60’s (guitarist Davey O’List), Jet emerged in 1975 to great expectations. Roy Thomas Baker had just produced their debut album, they were managed by Gary Glitter’s management team – where could they go but up?

In the autumn of 1974, the six-piece Jet (including keyboard player Sir ‘Peter’ Oxendale and second guitarist Ian Macleod) played their new demos to anyone who would listen. Among those who would was Jamie Turner, at the time working for Firefly Records.  He took the tape across Oxford Street to his pal Mike Leander, then managing Gary Glitter, about whom enough said. Mike liked the tape, signed the band, signed the songs, engaged his tailor and forked out for more demos.
Nicky Graham, later to reach notoriety with boy-band Bros, produced the second round of demos. The result was unimpressive. A third round of demos was embarked upon, this time produced by bassist/writer Martin Gordon. The results were more impressive (well, of course they were) but also considerably more expensive. Which was not surprising, as the band had pressed all three recording and editing suites at Trident Studios into simultaneous service. ‘Four thousand pounds?!?’ shrieked Leander, as he hurled the cassette with three songs on it across the table at Jet’s weekly meeting with management. ‘For THIS?!?!’ He took matters into his own hands, sacked second guitarist Macleod and signed Roy Thomas Baker as producer.

The recording of the album is a tale which we need not go into here. If you really want to know the details, check out the Jet story. Warning - it is in two parts. Suffice to say – the album was recorded. “The best thing about the sessions was the free sandwiches”, said drummer Chris Townson, many years later.

It is now February 1975. Jet ‘warms up’ with a few gigs in obscure places like the north of England and Scotland. Audiences are baffled by their penchant for drama, white satin capes and extreme volume. Back on safer ground in London, the band performs at the annual CBS convention. Overwhelmed by the performance, CBS Records sends Jet off to support Ian Hunter and Mick Ronson on their debut tour of the UK. The tour kicks off on March 13th in Sheffield and runs until April 6th.

For reasons of economy, management instruct Jet, the new personal manager (well, you had to have one, you see, or else your peers would sneer) Jamie Turner and their crew to travel up from London (with all their equipment) on the train. The band is not terribly pleased at this treatment, but submits grudgingly. Upon unloading and setting up for the first night in Exeter (or Sheffield, depending upon your powers of recall) on March 15th, they find that they go down surprisingly well. There is the small matter, however, of pacifying the Hunter-Ronson road crew. Bassist Martin Gordon attempts to put the monitor mixer in his place during the first sound check. He is taken quietly on one side and told that if he behaves like that again, he will find himself lying unconscious in the alleyway next to the theatre. He catches on rapidly, and Spade Dave (it was 1975, after all…) the monitor mixer become a regular face at later Jet gigs.

After a few nights of riotous living on the road, Gordon is recuperating in the Leeds (or Newcastle - please consult Jamie Turner for exact details) Holiday Inn sauna, chatting to a plump middle-aged chap who seems quite pleasant if a little forward for a complete stranger. 'And what do you do for a living?', asks Gordon politely. Oh dear. Along with his shades and leather trousers, Ian Hunter has left his sense of humour in his bedroom. He refuses to speak to Jet’s bassist for the remainder of the tour.

Guitarist Davey O'List (dubbed, rather cruelly, ‘Brian Damage’ by the band) ‘wanders the boards looking like a constipated anteater, tearing the occasional sheet of high-grade steel from his axe', according to one besotted critic. Keyboard player Oxendale has taken to wearing oversized women's fur coats to go with his green hair and, not to be outdone, O'List tries to kick down hotel doors with his bare feet. Perhaps he is looking for His River. Anyway, he breaks his foot, of course. One of his platform-soled stage boots is replaced by a comfy slipper, the height differential giving him the uneven gait of a Himalayan mountain goat as he lurches about the stage.

One night, as O’List emerges for the first number, his legs become entangled in his guitar lead and he topples over. Enraged, he flails his legs furiously and, with the help of a roadie, regains the vertical position. Oh dear, now his guitar has become unplugged and, despite all his thrashing, is silent. As roadies plug it on again, O’List’s proximity to the amp causes ear-splitting feedback - he stamps furiously on his pedals to stop the banshee screeching. The band have not waited for him become operational, and have launched into the first tune without him. As the song grinds to a conclusion, Davey shouts peevishly into Andy's mike, and thus to the whole audience, 'I wasn't ready! Why did you start without me?!?!' The band smile grimly and soldier on with the next number.
 
Andy Ellison steals Ian Hunter’s trademark ’Allo!’, with which both bands now open their respective sets. He is told off about this by Hunter’s ‘people’. Peter Oxendale contributes to the general air of unpredictability by being unable to keep his keyboards in tune. Ellison therefore sings a quartertone sharp if he is stage left over by the keyboards, and about a semitone flat if he’s stage right and closer to the guitar. Drummer Chris Townson has, at the last minute, broken his leg, and is replaced by the stalwart Jim Toomey, who just rolls his eyes and gets on with it.

And now to the year 2010. The Jet album of 1975 is still not available on CD, thanks to the wishes of the tea-ladies at BMG, who inherited it from CBS. So this - 'Some Flotsam' - is the next best thing. Many of the tunes from the album are here, along with a few oddities like ‘Horrible Breath’, a Marc Bolan tune that would later end up as the b-side to the Radio Stars single 'Nervous Wreck'. Recorded over two nights at the Hammersmith Odeon and the Bristol Colston Hall, you can compare alternative version of the same tunes. What drugs had various band members consumed between the London and Bristol performances of ‘Horrible Breath’? And where can I get some? The release is sourced from a soundboard recording.

Personnel:
Andy Ellison: vocals
Davey O’List: guitar
Sir  ‘Peter’ Oxendale: keyboards
Martin Gordon: bass
Jim Toomey: drums

Track listing:
Bristol Colston Hall April 1 1975
1 Intro
2 Tittle-Tattle
3 Cover Girl
4 Song For Hymn
5 Diamonds Are A Girl’s Best Friend
6 My Rivers
7 Horrible Breath
8 Brian Damage
9 Nothing To Do With Us

Hammersmith Odeon, London March 31st 1975
10 Song For Hymn
11 Diamonds Are A Girl’s Best Friend
12 My River
13 Horrible Breath
14 Brian Damage
15 Nothing To Do With Us

Listen to audio here, marvel and then have a lie down. I know I did.

PS Did you know? For the Herd of Herring tour of 2000, John's Children performed a number of tunes including Cover Girl, Nothing To Do With Us and the now-infamous ‘Jet-medley’, whereby It Would Be Good, Diamonds Are A Girl’s Best Friend and Whangdepootenawah were seamlessly cut up and stuck together again in a radical revisiting of these wobbly ‘glam classics’. Check it out here.

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