Somewhere There's a Place For Us

1. Dirty Pictures
2. Accountancy Blues
3. Johnny Mekon
4. The Ghost of Desperate Dan
5. This Is Your Next Life
6. My Mother Said
7. Somewhere There's A Place For Us
8. From A Rabbit

Dirty Pictures
I wanna take some dirty pictures of you
I wanna take some dirty pictures of you
As I'm peering through the shutter, I can feel my heart a-flutter
The view is getting seamy as the lens is getting steamy
watch out for my reflex as I'm giving you the bird

Dirty pictures turn me on,
they give me strictures but I have to keep on
taking pictures, dirty pictures
I get my kicks up in the attic with a Kodak Instamatic

I wanna take some dirty pictures of you
The dirtier the better, only filthy will do
As I rig up my umbrellas, the props are getting hotter
and the action's getting frantic as you're going through your antics
Head up, leg up, chest out - can you what?
Don't be absurd

Dirty pictures and he retreats once more to the attic

Accountancy Blues
I wanted to be an explorer but mummy wouldn't pay
I'd go by sea to Andorra or overland to Mandalay
but it didn't work out and I've got no choice
I'm going to be an accountant

I've got accountancy blues
I've need a new pair of shoes
I've got a job that's driving me crazy
I guess I'll go and join the Navy
(Oh, I guess I'll go and join the Navy)

I wanted to be a lion-tamer although I wasn't very strong
I hadn't been well for ages
and the circus man said the job had gone anyway
it didn't work out and I've got no choice
Now I'm going to be an accountant

I've got accountancy blues and he goes off to things aquatic

Johnny Mekon
There was a day when life was easier,
there was a time when people wanted to know
But now that's gone for ever,
my life is recorded in stereo
Day by day I was so sensational
you could see me every day in the national press
but now that's gone for ever,
you never hear me on the radio

Tell me that you I want you, want you

Carry your satchel? I got you, got you
I'm Johnny Mekon
I'm Johnny Mekon
I'm Johnny Mekon
Come on, you know me!

There came a day when success began to stop,
I changed my style
even so my records still missed, oh no - I got the gist
no more fast carsI
or fast women to be kissed
lost my fortune at the rate I lost my friends -
all in all I had trouble in making ends meet
I went back on the street,
the family shows didn't want me no more
Tell me that you

And now the moral and the way I'm seeing it,
a mumble mumble is a very much easier task for me
and I'm glad it's over cos in the end you make what you know

There was a day when life was easier,
there was a time when people wanted to know, but now it's gone forever,
my life's recorded in stereo

Tell me that you

The Ghost Of Desperate Dan
If this is the next life,
then all I can say is I don't want it
For women and nightlife,
the back of beyond's nothing on it

I am the ghost of Desperate Dan
Mine is the shade of a dangerous man
I am condemned to living in limbo
but this is the plan of Desperate Dan

I am the ghost of Desperate Dan
I live day by day
I do what I can
But soon it will be too late to save me;
so come when you ca n- save Desperate Dan

The walls are closing in,
the feeling's unpleasant
The nights are growing longer
I wish I could see my out of here

If this is the next life, then all I can say is
I don't want it
For women and nightlife
the back of beyond's nothing on it

I am the ghost of Desperate Dan
I know it's too late:
I'm hardly a man anymore
My time has gone by
My world's an illusion
So pray when you can
for Desperate Dan
Never a day goes by
but I think on
this miserable man
once Desperate Dan

I am the ghost and he goes on his ghostly way

This Is Your Next Life
And now for a bit of fun
Yes, at this very moment I'm hiding inside a large cow pie
Any second now I'm going to leap out, hopefully to a very surprised man
Desperate Dan - this is your next life!
I can call you Desperate?
Naff off, Eamonn!
I can call you Eamonn? And so on

My Mother Said
My mother said I never should
play with the gypsies in the wood
If I do she will shout,
she will stop me going out

My mother said I never should
play with the gypsies in the wood

She'd lock me up and throw away the key,
that's what my mother said to me
If I do she will say 'pack your bags and be on your way'

My mother said

Sometimes I wonder what's really going on;
the situation's getting worse

They'd carry me off to a distant land
force me to join their outlaw band
I think I would like those savage men:
I could stay up later than half past ten

Sometimes I wonder...

My mother said and so on until she fades out

Somewhere There's a Place For Us
To see that look upon their faces when they look at us,
you'd think that love was just a game and never serious
Maybe they never look at one another like we do
Maybe they never see just what it is I see in you

But those opinions that they just keep forming
will mean that, maybe by tomorrow morning,
we'll be packing up and out by evening
Someday we'll settle down but now we're leaving

Somewhere there's a place we can go,
somewhere a place that we can lie low,
a place to make world envious
Somewhere there's a place for us

We never stay around for longer than a day or two
It's not OK for us to do just as we wanna to do
Oh, they behave as though this story is a tragedy
don't even think about it, darling you look good to me

But they're insistent upon our leaving
My throat is dry and how my heart is heaving
Maybe one day we'll find a place worth staying
Until that day arrives, we'll just keep saying:

Somewhere there's a place we can go...

In every cloud, there's a silver lining
In my heart, the sun keeps shining through,
just for you it's gonna be fine today

They say our love affair should never have started
A fool and his money are quickly parted
I believe affairs of the heart are hard to quantify
Tell us how it is - do we owe them? do they owe you and I?

Somewhere there's a place we can go and indeed he goes off to have a look in another solar system

From A Rabbit
Kevin was a weed
He never pulled a bird
He didn't get a second look
He was so skinny
Kevin was a wally
(and he also was a nerd) 
He stayed at home and fucked around:
he felt so silly

The girls didn't see him,
he was totally ignored
he stayed at home with mother
who he totally adored

He was so skinny (skinny as a rake)
What does it take to make a man from a rabbit?
You've got to work work work or you'll never get the muscle
that the girls adore
They'll all want more
It'll open the door
to so much more

Johnny is a tough, he's always got a bird
You never see him on his own
His chest is hairy
Johnny is a gent, you'll never hear a nasty word
I'll tell you straight - he's really great,
he ain't no fairy 
The girls flock around him,
he's always on the ball 
He's loved by their mothers,
he's loved by them all

He was so skinny...

Biceps, triceps, physical development:
pectoral, radial, wonderful and heaven-sent
Biceps, triceps Nana na nana

The girls never see us - we're totally ignored
We stay home with mother who we totally adore

He was so skinny (skinny as a rake)
What does it take to make a man from a rabbit?
You've got to work work work or you'll never get the muscle and off he goes to get sand kicked in his face by three separate gorillas

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